


Another Person's Suffering

by Faux_dreams



Category: Persona 5
Genre: One Shot, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23603656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Faux_dreams/pseuds/Faux_dreams
Summary: Set before Madarame Ichiryusai's change of heart, an anxious boy finds himself in a block and decides to visit the gallery for inspiration.
Kudos: 3





	Another Person's Suffering

**Author's Note:**

> A one-shot I made a long while ago. I doubt this will turn into a whole series since I'm terrible about keeping myself motivated, but I wouldn't be opposed to writing more for the series if the inspiration hits.

“If you're not going to even bother trying to meet him, then I'm not going to even bother going with you.”   
“But you--”  
“I don't care, Ryunosuke, you're too selfish to do even one thing for me. Good luck even getting into the art world.”   
  
The redhead winced as he heard angry tapping on the other end before looking at his phone with a sigh. “But I already have the tickets...” He placed the phone on his desk, two plain looking tickets that read ' _Madarame Gallery'_ across them, sitting right beside it. In an attempt to bribe him, Ryu's mother had bought these tickets. Apparently she had wanted him to meet Madarame himself and become his apprentice, but there was just one problem with that. Ryu had no intentions of going into a fine arts career, he only painted for fun and to get frustrations out. Sure, at times he entered into contests, but his pieces have been lackluster for a while. They were bland, grey, they weren't full of life like he wanted. Just staring at the one in the corner of his room made his stomach turn.   
  
He leaned back in his chair, staring at his ceiling. “If I do go, though...well, I'll be alone so that's not all that bad. No nagging or anything.” He smiled weakly. “And who knows, maybe I'll get inspiration again. Maybe...Maybe.” He sighed once again. Well, there was no point in letting those tickets go to waste, and there was certainly no harm in going to the gallery. Not like he would be recognized in the first place. His mother's claws didn't reach that far in the first place.  
Getting up from his seat, the boy pulled on his jacket and grabbed his bag full of pencils, erasers, and his sketchbook.   
“Everything alright?” His father looked up from the menagerie of computer parts on the coffee table. He seemed surprised, he never saw his son actually going out in the day recently.   
“Yeah. I just want to take a walk. I should be home in time for dinner.” He gave him a smile before walking out of the apartment.   
  
' _What am I doing?'  
_ ' **You're too selfish to do this one thing for me!** '   
' _It's not like I'm going for a career in art. Maybe I should have stayed home after all.'  
_ ' **Madarame would love to take you under his wing. I hear he already has a pupil your age.** '  
' _I just want to create things people will feel happy to see...I can't even do that right now.'  
  
_ “Ticket please.” Ryu nearly jumped out of his skin as the ticket taker held his hand out. He looked up at him, at first shocked, but the annoyed look on his face made the boy nearly jump again as he gave him his ticket. Getting a nod from the taker, Ryu hurried into the gallery. It was packed full of people, he could barely make his way around the space comfortably. He could hear stuffy talks about one piece, and then a clear over-analyzation of another just a few steps away from him. Things like this was the reason why he barely went to galleries in the first place. Either a piece was torn apart or barely looked at in favor of just having bragging rights to say they saw it in person. They never looked at the pieces deeply enough. Or rather, at just the surface level.   
He caught a glimpse of one abstract painting as he was shoved around and for a moment, he felt...confused. The strokes were all right, they seemed even and calm, but deeper than that, with how the colors were added and how the faces were drawn, it all felt...painful. Like something wasn't right, as if the artist was dreading making this piece. His heart thumped ever so slightly before he reached for his bag. “Ack!” He couldn't even pull out his sketchpad before he was shoved once more, though it felt like he finally broke out of a riptide. There were barely any people in the back of the gallery, they only seemed focused on what was immediately in their sights. Which was good, for Ryu at least. No crowds could bother him back here. And hopefully, no individuals.  
  
He was finally able to pull his sketchbook out of his bag along with a pencil. He was more hoping to take notes on the colors used and the composition of the paintings. He hoped that maybe these notes will help him with his own projects in some way. Just give him the motivation he needed to make a truly heartfelt piece. But no matter where he looked in this gallery, all he saw was despair. A deep, purple pit in front of him, sucking out every hopeful feeling in his heart. “What's going on with this old man?” He muttered to himself as he looked at another abstract painting. Again, it just gave him feelings of anxiety and loathing. And yet...it tried to look so serene and relaxing. He shook his head and added another note before moving on. Finally, he got to a far corner where a row of paintings hung, all very much the same and yet...one stood out to him.  
He could feel his breath catch in his chest as he stared at it. A mountainside bathed in sunset glow, the water reflecting the orange-red hue above it, the trees felt so lively and the mountains felt so formidable. And yet, for such a serene painting, he could only see anger and frustration. His heart felt conflicted, it was beautiful yet so extreme in it's emotion. He adored it, yet he felt saddened after staring for so long. Without even thinking about it, he pulled his phone from his back pocket and readied the camera. He made a quick glance around before taking a quick picture of the painting, then with one swift movement of his hands, his phone was back in his pocket. “...Ugh what am I doing?” He muttered once more to himself. Having a picture of a painting like that wouldn't help him. Yet he felt so compelled to keep it somehow. There was no way he could afford this painting even if he were to work all the nights he could or even allow himself to sleep with guests, so perhaps that's why he took the picture. His one and only selfish act to keep something that wasn't his to keep, was to take a picture of it when he knew he could very well get kicked out for even having his phone out.   
  
“What about this one?” The boy flinches before taking a few steps to the side, hearing a couple people walk up behind him. He attempts to hide his sketchbook against his chest, though takes a chance glance at the two. He's surprised to see a blonde woman with pigtails, he recognized her as his classmate, though he knows she's not in his class. He swore he knew her name...was it Ann? He then looks to the boy next to her and his eyes widen ever so slightly. He doesn't know his name or the school he goes to, but he can feel the same...or rather, see the same emotions in his eyes as he does the painting.   
' _He made that painting...'_ His mouth hung agape as he stared far longer than he needed to, and only realized when he saw the two starting to turn their heads towards him. He shook his head and quickly turned to get out of their way. However, he almost immediately bumped into someone on his way towards the exit. “S-Sorry! I wasn't paying attention!”  
“It's quite alright.” Responded a light, yet old sounding voice. Ryu blinked and looked up at the man, noticing his long grey hair and moustache. Even his kimono seemed old and dusty.   
“M-M-Madarame...” The boy stuttered again, now feeling even worse than he did before.  
“Oh so you do recognize me. I was beginning to think I didn't make enough of an impression in all my other exhibits.” The old man laughed, it was...strangely lighthearted. It felt odd to the boy, like it was forced to a point. “Is that a sketchbook in your hands?”   
“O-Oh! Uhm...Yes. I hope you don't mind, I just...it's usually for practice.”   
“I don't mind at all. Inspiring young artists like yourself always fills me with great joy. If you don't mind, I'd like to have a look.” His kind eyes didn't give him any hints as to what he was really feeling, or if he was scheming anything. He just seemed so normal...too normal. Either way, the boy nodded and handed over the book, though he seemed more self-conscious than usual. He kept his eyes on the floor as he heard the pages flip every now and again. “My My...” The old man began, finding a sketch he particularly liked. It was one of two mountains overlooking a city, with a sun nestled just behind them. A poem was written in the corner, though the darkened edges showed the young boy had erased the same spot over and over again a little too much. “You have great talent for someone your age. A poem going along with the drawing isn't used very much in this day and age. The picture as a whole invokes feelings of youth, it's a wonderful piece.”   
Ryu looked shocked for a moment. He only ever felt dread when he looked at that sketch, he didn't even like the painting of it. “T-Thank you. You're too kind, it's nowhere near your level of skill.” He chuckled sheepishly and reached for his sketchbook, which was kindly handed over to him.  
“Maybe so, but we could change that. I'm still looking for pupils if you're interested.” There was a pause. The redhead could feel his heart thumping in his chest, this was an opportunity of a life time! Yet...every fiber of his being was telling him to refuse. He even told his mother he wasn't going to become his pupil. He wasn't going to be a fine arts major in the first place. He shook his head and pulled his sketchbook to his chest again.   
“I'm sorry, I have to refuse. It's already getting late for me, I have to go. Thank you.” He said all of this quickly, almost too quickly. And before Madarame could even try to convince him, the young man had turned and immediately pushed his way out of the exhibit, not even realizing the two other pairs of eyes staring at him.   
  
Ryu held his chest as he tried to calm his breathing, he slid down gradually against an alley wall as he tried to count to 10, though it didn't seem to help. His heart was beating far too loudly, far too hard for anyone to be comfortable with. He shook his head, trying to clear his mind as his free hand reached for his phone. He could still text his father, he could still get home safely if he asked him to meet him in Shibuya. However, he had forgotten about the photo he had taken only moments again. His breathing stopped as he saw the red background again, the calming strokes and soft sunlight from the painting. His breathing went from a shallow, quick pace to a soft, long inhale. He pressed his phone to his forehead as he began to count to 10. “It's going to be fine. I'll be fine. Nothing bad happened, it's fine...” He spoke calmly to himself before pulling his phone away from his forehead. He stared at the painting a while longer before setting it as his background. He smiled, though it was small and wavering. “How pathetic...another person's suffering is my solace...” He shouldn't like this painting as much as he does, yet he can't help it. It's all the things he can't get across in his own art and yet it tells him it's fine that he feels frustration and anger. “It's going to be fine...It's going to be fine.” He repeated as he stood up and put his phone back into his pocket.


End file.
